Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Wonderfully Funny Wednesdays!

Since its hump day, I thought a funny personal story or anecdote I find will help us all get over Wednesday.  Heck, its winter even, so we need that extra 'oomph' to keep us whistling along towards Friday.

This week I found an excerpt from a high school Home Ec class of the 1950's  thought it was rather amusing just how simple they made homemaking sound!  Now its seen as something that can be done on the side of a full-time job & child-rearing thrown in as a little quip.  Well, we all know it may seem easy, but unless you are a proficient corporate whiz, professional diva wife & super mommy with major help from an expensive daycare, it takes time to become a Domestic Diva such as this story describes (though learning some homemaking tips on top of just cooking in Home Ec 1&2 would've been helpful to me; also leaving off the full-time job helps too):

Home Economics For Women In The 1950's

July 31st 2007 00:40
From a 1950's high school home economics textbook, teaching girls how to prepare for married life.

1950 housewife
1. Have dinner ready: Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal on time.

This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him, and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospects of a good meal are part of the warm welcome needed.

2. Prepare yourself: Take 15 minutes to rest so you will be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking.
He has just been with a lot of work- weary people. Be a little gay and a little more interesting. His boring day may need a lift.

3. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives, gathering up school books, toys, paper, etc. Then run a dust cloth over the tables.
Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order, and it will give you a lift, too.

4. Prepare the children: Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces if they are small, comb their hair, and if necessary, change their clothes.
They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part.

5. Minimize the noise: At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of washer, dryer, dishwasher or vacuum. Try to encourage the children to be quiet.
Be happy to see him. Greet him with a warm smile and be glad to see him.

6. Things to avoid: Don't greet him with problems or complaints. Don't complain if he's late for dinner.
Count this as minor compared with what he might have gone through that day.

7. Make him comfortable: Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or suggest he lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes.
Speak in a low, soft, soothing and pleasant voice. Allow him to relax and unwind.

8. Listen to him: You may have a dozen things to tell him, but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first.

9. Make the evening his: Never complain if he does not take you out to dinner or to other places of entertainment; instead, try to understand his world of strain and pressure, his need to be home and relax.

10. The goal: Try to make your home a place of peace and order where your husband can relax.
While this may be funny to read; I wonder if some of this might need to be taken to heart.  Maybe the idea of how the home feels when you look at it & making sure its appealing to all who enter.  Just don't be so aloof about it or be patronizing....but a good dinner ready to go & a nice-looking home not only is for the husband's benefit, but for yours too....
One final joke before we go on with our day:

The other night I was invited out for a night with "the girls." I told my husband that I would be home by midnight, "I promise!" Well, the hours passed and the margaritas went down way too easy.

Around 3 a.m., a bit loaded, I headed for home. Just as I got in the door, the cuckoo clock in the hall started up and cuckooed 3 times.
Quickly, realizing my husband would probably wake up, I cuckooed another 9 times. I was really proud of myself for coming up with such a quick-witted
solution, in order to escape a possible conflict with him.
(Even when totally smashed...3 cuckoos plus 9 cuckoos totals 12 cuckoos = MIDNIGHT!)

The next morning my husband asked me what time I got in, and I told him "Midnight." He didn't seem pissed off at all. Whew! Got away with that one!
Then he said, "We need a new cuckoo clock." When I asked him why? he said, "Well, last night our clock cuckooed three times, then said, "Oh. ****."
cuckooed 4 more times, cleared it's throat, cuckooed another 3 times, giggled, cuckooed twice more, and then tripped over the coffee table and farted.